337.5

337.5 is a very significant number to me.

About 8 years ago now, I was 337.5 pounds, and it was the fattest I’d ever been, and I felt disgusting and gross, and none of my clothes fit, and I resolved to lost some weight. And for about 2 years, that’s what I did — I went to they gym 3 days a week, and I went to Weight Watchers, and I worked my way down from 337.5 to about 259 pounds.

And then I had one very, very bad week — a week in which I was robbed by a man with a crowbar in my own home and had my car nearly destroyed by an idiot who couldn’t park.

And then it all fell apart, and I stopped going to the gym 3 days a week. I’d still go sometimes, but not, you know, every time. And I stopped writing down my food. Not all the time, but sometimes, you know?

And 8 years later, after several attempts to start and stop and restart and blah, blah, blah, I was at 369 pounds, which was the new winner for fattest I’d ever been, and I felt disgusting and gross and none of my clothes fit and I resolved to lose some weight. That was about a year ago.

And there have been more ups and downs and downs and up and ons and offs since then. But now, today, I’m 337.5 pounds, and the last 8 years, whatever they might have meant for the rest of my life, are, weight-wise, a complete wash.

It’s not a victory, it’s kind of an anti-milestone, but at least it represents having recovered from the damage, and that, I suppose, is something.

Woot! Woot!

5 pounds lost since I started tracking my food consumption.

Well Fuck.

Yesterday, I met some friends for drinks and then we went out to a karaoke club (why yes, I did sing, badly, yet not so badly that I was the worst singer there). Then I came home on one of the last trains, and basically fell into bed.

And nowhere during all of that did I drink my third glass of water.

It was my unbroken streak, and I’m pretty bummed about breaking it.

On the other hand, I’ve lost five pounds since returning from Vancouver, without even trying, so that’s nice.

Non-Non-Scale Victory

My weigh in this morning was 355 all of a sudden. Not sure where that came from, though, historically, I have always lost weight like that. I’ll be rolling along for a few weeks at the same basic weight give or take a pound, then drop 5 all of a sudden, then roll along at the new weight for a few weeks.

I’m not really dieting so I’m not really losing weight, but it is gratifying to see a little weight come off.

Grr.

I know I’m not ‘really dieting’ and that I spent Tuesday night at a giant festival of eating lots of things, but it still irks me to see my weigh in number go up!

…I wouldn’t carry this weight alone

I still haven’t picked a calorie tracker, so I’m not making calorie tracking my thing of the week as planned.

Instead, I’m going to pick weighing in every day as my thing of the week.

Some people argue for not weighing in more than once a week, and others not more than once a month, but I used to do the hacker’s diet thing and weigh in every day, and I actually found that I obsessed *less* about the weigh in differences when I was doing that than when I was doing weekly weigh-ins.

The everydayness of it meant that fluctuations were going to happen, and they didn’t need to be a source of stress, whereas when I’ve tried weighing in weekly, if I didn’t lose weight (even if that was because I had forgotten to weigh in until after I drank a glass of water), then I would stress out about that.

So, every morning, shortly after I get up, and before I get dressed or eat, I will weigh myself and enter that data into whatever software program I eventually choose for weighing in.

This morning, I weighed 361lbs.